Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
