I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
