Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize