well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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