That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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