make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
