People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
only if we run a train.
done.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
