found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
