just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize