big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize