what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
