we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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