Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
We have so much sex to catch up on
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
