You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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