You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
