I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize