I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Randomize
