We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
