Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize