Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
