i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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