It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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