Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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