Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize