I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize