I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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