dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
