no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
