honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
