went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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