I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
