At least make sure they are 18
Why
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
