I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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