I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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