I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
my vag is so smooth its legendary
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
