Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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