I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize