my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize