so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
