this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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