You just made me feel so damn special
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize