I want to stick my p in your. b.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize