fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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