Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
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Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
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Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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