please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
party gras won. party gras always wins.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
