Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
