Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
