My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Randomize
