big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
She needs sedatives and a leash
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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