i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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