I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Success! We fucked roommates!
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize