I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
