just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Sorry my hands just texted you
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
