I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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