You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
